Lovestorm

Rain…

The rain beats heavily on my window pane
Its incessant and a little bit wild.

But it reminds me of you

Takes me back to the place

Where the rain meant we were together

The rain meant that you were closeby

The rain meant love

The rain meant you…

I don’t know if the coolness of the rain made me glow or the warmth in your face…

The forbidding rain didn’t scare me it swept me away in your cool mist…

The rain beating hard

Only reminds me of you

It doesn’t chill or threaten

But fills my heart with visions 

Of you and me in that beautiful rain again…

You are not my winter love or my summer sweetheart

You are my rain…my storm full of love…

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A little gratitude

Life does seem to be the same year after year.Although there aren’t many surprises or new adventures that I embark on(don’t think I’m the adventurous sort),there isn’t anything new in the love front or I think will ever be and work is slow,despite all of this I have those special moments to be grateful for,the tiny blessings that come my way.

So I’m going to list down some of the things I’ve been thankful for,being that we are half way through 2017.

Home improvement

We took up a home improvement project in Summer and I thoroughly enjoyed it.The absolute chaos around the house,the workers coming in and out,seeing the house slowly transforming not into entirely something new but new and sparkling just the same.Loved the hustle and bustle it created for a short time in our lives and my new work shelf.


Getaway with big sister

My sister treats me to a trip to Goa every year since younger sister is always broke.We had a really relaxing time and being by the beach was wonderful.The beach in the rains is beautiful and I loved the wind and the spray of rain on me.It does nourish my soul to be there with my soul sister and hate coming back which explains the grumpiness on the way back.

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Books

I’ve taken up reading again like I’m on some kind of read-a-thon.Books have kept me company,they’ve helped me switch off from my phone and they’re so comforting.No greater solace than a good book.My favourite read this year has been the one I’m currently reading.The Girl You Left Behind-Jojo Meyes..it’s lovely.The kind of book you want to finish but not quite.


Friend

Yes I say friend because I’ve had one constant friend this year who I can talk to everyday about everything.From the mundane to the important to just about anything.I’m grateful I have at least one such friend in this world.


Sweet mother

Mum has been my constant companion and I can vent out just about anything to her.She’s not judgemental about things that bother me and understands completely where I’m coming from.I love her so.


Drawings

I’m no artist but lately I look up a picture and try to sketch it.It gives me great joy and I love adding a filter to it occasionally.


Bandra by foot

Bandra is my home and one of my friends arranged a walk through some of its tiny winding lanes and we ended up getting some great pictures.Pictures of home..so much to still discover about it.



Six little sunbeams

I have six little children who come to me for classes which is the only work I have and they really keep me going.I love it when we can laugh together.


Every year although the universe denies me a lot,I am unusually blessed by these simple moments and wonderful people that make the world seem like a special place to be and fill my heart with contentment.

What makes you content,what makes you breathe a little,what makes you smile,what makes you feel loved,what makes your world go round? 

Harley,my brother and me!


I don’t know much about bikes or how they work.Hell I don’t know how to ride a bicycle.But the one thing I love about them is the sound.I love bikes that have a raw almost beautiful roar.

As teenagers we used to sit by the promenade on the beach and apart from the boys we loved admiring the bikes.Our heads would turn if we would hear the roar of a bike even from a distance.

Even now I’m most fascinated if a Harley Davidson would pull up next to the rickshaw I’m riding in well which has its own strange sound but not quite like the Harley next to me.

These days I truly believe that things you often dream of come to you almost unexpectedly.Accidently on a day you think would be just ordinary there is a happy surprise..serendipity.

So on a Monday morning when you’re hit that you have a week ahead of you until the weekend again,my brother in law takes me on my first Harley ride (his friend’s bike loaned to him for a month).Well I couldn’t believe that I was actually going to sit on one.

It was great seeing my brother ride into the lane.Ahhhh! The roar was just magical..really sweet!


So all I had to do was wear a helmet which took me awhile to figure out,get my shades on and get on.

From the moment we started I went into a space where I felt a connection with the bike and the road.Everything else just seemed to fade away into the background including my thoughts.

Just to mention here that I felt really cool and so like a biker chic.

We even saw the parade for May Day and ended the ride with a lovely breakfast.Brother and sister both equally thrilled.I think we both didn’t talk much and just loved the sheer joy of riding on a Harley!

Things do happen in your life that may seem random but lead to something that makes you incredibly happy.It always comes in the most mysterious and silent ways,holding your heart and your mind for that moment where you pause and say to yourself this is what I had once wished for and it leaves with that gentle,beautiful roar reminding you to have faith in the universe and above all yourself.

Cheers to many more Harley experiences and dreams coming true!

Slow Dance

Silence can mean a lot of things.Lately I’ve found that the more I want to spend time alone the more content I feel with myself and everything around.

Growing inward though is just not about a happy and spiritual feeling.It starts with overthinking.Overthinking about everything from relationships to career to lost love.

Then the overthinking leads you to do stupid things.Once that’s done you think some more.In all your solitude,the loneliness that seeps into you,you begin to find answers.

Answers that help you find the calm after,answers that renew your spirit and answers that let you continue to question everything about yourself,the good and the bad,the new and the old,what you are and who you will be.

Growing inward,being silent just gives you a chance to truly love yourself.This does not mean that your connections with people weaken.It only helps you to stay open to new experiences to new people entering your life and strengthen the old ones and infuse love into them again.

I know I write this in a time when I haven’t had chances to meet people,friends.It has even then been a moment of great happiness to find the me in me,to find my own space,to be my own best friend and to hope with a big smile of things yet to come when things won’t be as quiet or deep,that there will be laughter and the chatter of friends around me.It’s just that now I know that I can find my joy in both worlds.Accepting and appreciating what comes to me in every moment and embrace it fully.

So don’t let your silence break your heart.Don’t let it kill you to sit in the dark.Give that silence,a hug and trust that it will have a long conversation with you.It will slowly start to feel like a party for two.A slow dance between you and your soul.

The Little Woman

Everyone is celebrating Women’s Day today.They are celebrating strong,independent,savvy and beautiful women.I wonder if I fit in any of those categories or ever have.Is there any room for the kinder,gentler kind of women.The one who prefer home over an office.The one who still dream of finding love in order to have a complete life.The one who is no superwoman or one that can multitask.

Is there room for the plainer,simpler kind? The one who craves space instead of filling every minute of the day accomplishing and achieving.

I wonder if people hold the same admiration for a woman a little shy,a little less bold,unambitious but never holding back on compassion,her giving ways,loving those around her and having her own passions and interests.I wonder if Women’s Day celebrates the Softer Souls not just the Strong Ones.

To all the women retain your weirdness,your tenderness,your compassion.Don’t let the world make you hard and bitter.Be gentler always mostly to yourself.Stay kind,choose love and family over extra hours at work.Be strong if you must we must all be to survive just never forget the woman in you.

Being soft is never a weakness it is only one loving way of staying strong!!

Happy Women’s Day to all kinds of women!!

End the day with Ellen!


It’s funny how sometimes a simple T.V.  show can become your comforting moment at the end of a long,tiring day and you find yourself looking forward to it everyday.Well this one show I never liked at the start or paid much attention to(maybe I couldn’t keep up with all the jokes because it’s so ‘American’) has now become my happy and peaceful moment of the day.

The Ellen Degeneres  Show is not one of those shows which is just an addiction no not at all,it’s something very positive.Ellen the host for me has this whole magical,upbeat,sweet and sunshiny aura.She truly radiates in the way she looks,how she interacts with celebrity guests,her spontaneous dancing with the audience and making everyone laugh be young or old.

Not only that she’s supercool and so with the times it scares me to see her lip sync with songs I have no clue about:p Her sense of humour just goes with her lovely voice.

Although the show revolves around celebrities,musicians,sports personalities you never get that rich and famous vibe about the show.All the guests show their witty,funny and down to earth side and are so sporting.

tWitch who is the resident DJ of the show is in harmony with everything and in total sync with Ellen.He lends a great presence to the show and I always picture him and his moves when I think of the lovely theme song by P!nk for the show ‘Today’s the day’.


The show has another element I love which are the surprise prizes and charities they are involved with.Ellen really goes by her words ‘Be kind to everyone’.It’s nice that she stresses on the importance of kindness.The world really needs it.

All the cool games like ‘Oops my water broke!’ create an atmosphere of fun.

At this point you may be wondering why all the information about a show everyone maybe already watching.It is such a good part of my day that I had to write about how much I love watching Ellen.

To Ellen I say always stay smiling,beautiful,radiate and keep spreading your generous sunshine.

🎶 I used to want to grow up
I thought that I could be free

But now I’m realizing

It’s cool, it ain’t for me

It’s cool, cause all my dreams

Are more than possibilities

I get so vicious

When I don’t feel delicious

I just need a friend

So much to carry

These days are kinda scary I don’t want the fun to end
Oh oh oh

Today’s the day I’ve been waiting for

Tomorrow won’t come after all

Yesterday’s so far away

This today is the only day

Somebody please stop the clock

Oh oh oh

Don’t ever let this day stop

Oh oh oh

I never wanna go home

No

No, no no
I’m a say today’s my day

I’m a say today’s my day

I’m a say today’s my day

I’m a say it’s gonna go my way
I’m a say today’s my day

I’m a say today’s my day

I’m a say today’s my day

I’m a say it’s gonna go my way

Oh oh oh🎶


Good night Ellen!

The sound of thunder in ‘Heaven’.

“The first casualty of war is innocence.”

Innocence and purity of a beautiful place Jammu and Kashmir.It’s beauty I’ve only heard of and seen in pictures.It’s pain felt by everyone.

 In the seventeenth century, the Mughal emperor Jahangir said that if paradise is anywhere on the earth, it is here (the Kashmir Valley), while living in a houseboat on Dal Lake.”Gar firdaus, ruhe zamin ast, hamin asto, hamin asto, hamin ast”, which translates to “if there is ever a heaven on earth, it’s here, it’s here, it’s here”. 


The conflict in this place for more than a century has rendered pain and torment among it’s people.

To attain anything we have to strive for it every step of the way..every kind word helps overcome the deepest fears,love always conquers hate,silence is always better than aggression for all these to have a positive effect and override the negative it requires patience,willpower and determination. Evil will prevail but the power of these positive forces will in time conquer it.So is the same for peace we cannot make a promise to it and not follow through with it at every step and the only way of achieving it is through peaceful ways.I don’t believe any war has been won by hate but the need for peace will always prevail first within ourselves and then in the world.


I wish too for Kashmir that it’s conflict be resolved in peaceful ways,that the sound of bombs be replaced with a birdsong,that the years of anguish on the faces of its people light up with that of hope and joy,that the countries involved       come together to rebuild new bonds and leave the past behind,that a soldier can walk through its streets not to protect it but just to admire with their families and most of all that it’s lost innocence be restored and that it be only remembered for its flawless,pristine and peaceful beauty.

I hope not only for Kashmir but countries in the world where rebuilding love and harmony should be the most urgent concern and people and countries should unite to strive for it.

But most of all I hope that I can walk down a lane in Kashmir one day and truly understand the chaos in its beauty.

*All pictures (wish I had my own) and factual information taken from the Internet.

Making it work!

“Happiness is working from home and being your own boss.”

A few years ago I had to quit my full time job as a teacher and trying to fit into a new place of work came with a lot of obstacles.I gave myself a complete break and then decided to do something on my own.I started a small elocution,speech and drama class from home last year now called Spotlight.

With the help of a few friends I got about a handful of students to start with.I was happy to be finally doing something although it was very little work and hard to get by but I didn’t want to give up on it.

January,2016 the new year and I was left with just one,sweet regular student.I was worried but I had faith I could keep this going and make it work.A dear friend of mine who has helped me set up the class right from the start came to my rescue again.I was able to revive the classes again and even had some tuitions to help me out financially.

The year has gone by with its ups and downs.I am thankful to have a few students in my class as the year slowly comes to a close.

Being your own boss means you get to make all the decisions even the tough ones.It has also given me time to do the things I love and most of all I’m healthy and happy.It always pays to stay determined and persistent on your goal even if all the odds are against it.Although the work that I do will always remain unpredictable I am blessed to have work and still be able to teach children.

My three favourite people who have had faith in my work and helped me along the way~

My mum who sits in on all my classes and gives me advice whenever I need it.

My sister always helps advertise my class and spread the word.

My ex colleague and friend who sends me most of the students I get to work with and constantly eggs me on.

My favourite student although I shouldn’t have favorites.Well she’s been with me for over a year and has been the most regular student.Little Rhea has been my one reason to keep the class running.

My favourite theatre game to teach has to be Zapping where the children take on different TV channels but talk about one theme.Zapping through the channels as if you were watching TV.

The children’s favorite skit to enact ‘The Hot Chocolate Shop’.

My favorite poem to teach ‘Spaghetti’. The children took time memorizing the lines but enjoyed reciting it at the end.

So if you have a dream even if small don’t let anything hold you back,walk on and you will find tiny moments of happiness happen to you miraculously on days you never expected.If you believe in your work be determined to make it work!

Friendly Tales

We make friends in every phase of our life.They are never constant,each playing their part and either moving on or staying a big part in your life forever.There have been moments of great kindness,where a friend has meant the world and getting by without them wouldn’t have been easy.

In my last year of  school everything went spiraling down for me and while my true best friends didn’t quite understand how to deal with what was happening to me,two of my classmates who I didn’t speak to that much or hung out with turned out to be my pillars of strength.They never left my side during lunch break or class hours to school events.They empathized completely with what I was feeling and saw me through the year.Although when we all went off to college we headed out in seperate directions they will always have a special place in my heart.

In college we always have that one boyfriend who is more like a brother.I did too.Once we had a big project to complete and worked very hard to put it together.But I needed someone to sketch out a nice cover page for it and even though my friend wasn’t in our group for the project he volunteered for it.The day he was to come to my home to work on it,it rained heavily and Mumbai rains they create havoc .I thought he wouldn’t make it but he did really late.He patiently sat down to work on it and went home.It was the sweetest gesture to go all out of his way for me.

Examinations are something where every friend becomes competitive and studies on their own all locked up in their rooms.This one time I fell ill and needed someone to help me study.Three of my closest friends didn’t hesitate at all and formed a study group and motivated me to study and pass my exams.These friends have been through with me through the good and bad times.

When you want to speak your heart out about the weird,the whimsical, the worrisome,the heartbreaking,the crazy,the ‘Anything’ my best girlfriend is the world’s best listener and she will never judge you and will always have a solution or something really wise to say.I’ve spent all my teen years talking to her and also sharing a lot of laughs on the way.

There are some friends you stay connected with all your life and my three girlfriends from college have been through all my ups and down.The three of them have literally been my guides through everything.

Sometimes family make great friends too.My sister and mum have helped me through every school assignment,sickness,exam and we share an everlasting bond.

In the past few years my career hasn’t been going too great and my ex colleague has been there every step of the way from helping me start my classes to taking me out and keeping me happy.Love having her in my life.

There are countless friends to thank.I just hope that I’ve been a true friend too,almost like a guardian angel! 

 

For the love of a song.

Music has been a part of us always.We grew up listening to mum’s collection.She loved Cliff Richard ,Elvis, Jim Reeves,Pat Boone,Dean Martin,Connie Francis.We would wake up to any of these blaring loud.Then my sister had her 70s music.Then we were hit by MTV and it’s videos grew on us.

But there came a stage when songs attached themselves to a memory,a moment,lost love.

Nothing like some music when you’re out walking.Walking can’t be done without it.

Listening to Don Mclean’s Vincent late at night on FM and stay up just for it the next day.

Listening to a fresh playlist and discovering a song you fall in love with.

Then those rainy nights when you’re feeling lonely music helps you cry,smile and feel better.

The moments when you’re looking for answers music pulls you out and refreshes you with it’s sweet melody.

Music thrills you at a concert it gets the crowd moving to one thumping beat,a synergy and a common love.

Music gives you those ahhh moments when you hear a tune,a lyric beautifully sung.All you do is shake your head in wonder how a chord can touch your heart as much.

And then there are the times when music is playing and you just have to get up and dance..No joy so pure and simple.

Music you mean more to me than you’ll ever know.Thanks for embracing me in my darkest days and lifting me up high again.Hope that my dance with you plays on forever.Hope that the music never dies…